Thursday, March 15, 2012

Facing My Nightmares Follow Up

Today is/was the deadline I asked to hear back from my former-bosses/friends as to their official reason for firing me, I have had no reply.

Full story at:  http://www.thefightofmylife.blogspot.com/2012/03/facing-my-nightmares.html

This kind of surprised me, but then again, welcome to my life and learning a whole new curriculum about human behavior via the school of hard knocks!  :)

This is one of those cases I have to make closure for myself.  I stated my truth.  I asked my questions.  I have a voice.

It was December 5, 2002 when I was fired.  Keep in mind, they helped me move to my new home at the end of October, I had spent Thanksgiving with their family, in the spring of that year the boss' wife held a surprise Birthday party for me and invited patients, etc. 

The day I was fired I was told they felt "God was preparing me for the ministry" and that I was "being squelched at the office" [their exact phrases.].  I said that I respected their decision and would leave on good terms.  The boss'' wife said, "Don't go being nice or anything."

They said it was not due to finances or mistakes I'd made.  I was asked if I wanted a Letter of Recommendation from them, I declined which I regret to this day.  They told me with my skills and abilities working with people I'd have no problem finding another job.

The boss' wife asked me what they should tell the patients.  In my head I clearly heard, "That's none of my business, this was your decision."  [I later learned from patients they told them NOTHING!  When they asked about me, they were simply told "she's not here."  They didn't say anything other than that!  Incredible.  Staggering to considering this was a Christian chiropractor and his wife.  Wow.]

From that point on everything changed, it was the first Christmas I would be unable to give gifts and I would never again have confidence or security about being able to keep my home.  My injured brain needed that routine of familiarity and structure of having the job I held pre-injury.

Fast forward a couple of years where the ex-boss, says in sworn deposition for my auto accident cases, that I was trouble long before the first car accident, he inferred it was due to a relationship break up and the terms "willful insubordination" were used.  Wow.  Really?  I'd imagine if I were really that kind of trouble his wife would not have thrown a surprise birthday party for me just the month before.

Because of his testimony, the Brain Injury portion of the two auto accidents was completely THROWN OUT!  None of the other evidence mattered - none of the doctors I'd seen, my diagnosis, those grueling times of rehab, all gone from this case.  It was the single most painful event of my life. 

When I talk of life with TBI being hellish, that's no under- or over-statement.  How people can be so blatantly greedy and cruel is beyond my comprehension.  Friends?  Not even close.

There is clearly still a lot of negative energy around this event and anger.  I know in the past years I did not have a chance to truly grieve that huge loss because of being thrown 'under the bus' as they say, and just trying to survive.  I did not understand their reasons for firing, I still don't.  When I'd run into patients they'd ask me what happened.  They'd tell me they did not know if I was sick, dead, or whatever!  Every time I said I did not know, their reply would be, "They had to give you a reason."  No, the cruel reality is no, they don't.  Washington state is an at-will state when it comes to employment, they can fire you for anything.

Heck, I even ran into my boss' wife's best friend shortly after I was fired and SHE asked me what happened, what the reason was, etc.  Even she said it didn't make sense, that it would have made sense if I was sleeping with the boss!  Wow.

In this case I was CLEARLY fired because I was disabled and unable to function in my job, so much so the chiropractor's wife came in and helped me run the front desk for two weeks immediately following the accident. 

I just wanted the official reason in writing from them and they cannot even grant that. 

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